Scarybirds

I.D.1 0.T.

Thought that was a good start. Its good to be back home in the new super dooper Scarybirds site. I'm one of the ancient members, so old that my laptop is plugged into the main stone at Stonehenge and is solar powered. I was here long before some of you. My father was a clairvoyant and my mother was a contortionist, the result being that I can forsee my own end.

My main contribution is humour, no stone unturned. If your expecting me to be PC, no chance.

I hope the galleries are coming back, I have some new pics to hang on the walls. I have a great collection of Leysdown on Sea pictures,( Im leaving the place today, and the place deserves all the(BAD), publicity it can get). If God was to give the world an enema, this is where he would stick the tube. The Romans called this place the Isle of Sheep, I think it was written down wrong and should have been the Isle of Shit. Its also known as Fraggle Rock or Craggy Island. I wish I could have saved up the money for enough semtex to blow up the two bridges that connect this swamp to the mainland. Carreers advice for the girls is, "Get up the duff, claim social and get on the council list for a house,". While for the male of the species,its," Get someone up the duff, get tagged and an ASBO, claim social, work on the quiet and move into her council house". 

I'm going back to North Wales, where the men are men and sheep look worried. New job, new start in life, basically same shit, different day with new views.

I read today of a guy who had won millions on the lottery and it had made him unhappy and ill, both mentally and physically. What a tit, seems to be the comment that springs to mind.

Speaking of tits, in the same Sunday rag, was a story about a woman who had almost suffocated her other half while having sex in the apache position,( Woman knelt on top,). The reason was his face was under her 40 inch LL bosoms. She said he normally likes it and I thought while he was frailing around, he was enjoying himself. Personally speaking, if I had a choice of which way I was going to depart this mortal coil, this one would probably be pretty close to the top of my list, in fact thinking about it...........no I've got to stop thinking about it.

Anyway, thats it. I'm off for a ham shank, and I havent made the apple sauce yet. Not what you thought was it?

Welcome to the new members to the site. Enjoy.

Death.